The Past

With the windows down and the radio loud she’s singing as she cruises ‘round the town.

  She’s got her short shorts on and her hair’s streaming in the breeze, she’s smiling and she’s waving bringing guys to their knees.

  She’s nineteen, and it’s seventy nine, the summer’s rolling on and all is fine.

 Billy Joel is singing “Stranger”, and she sees her greatest danger as the boy she’s been stringing along.

  Out of the blue comes a sound to her that’s new and it stops her dead in her tracks.

  It’s a little baby girl who is the focus of her world and reality of a sudden is back.

   She’s in a mini van with a bottle in her hand, and a seat full of groceries to boot.

  She’s wearing mom jeans, Elmo’s singing ABC, and her world is surrounded by cute.

 She thinks back on those days when just cruising was the way to spend her free time in the sun.

  Now she’s by the kiddie pool and she’s wiping off the drool that has just run down her arm.

  She reflects as she coos that those days may have been misused but they sure were lots of fun.

  Now that boy is a dad because of all the fun they had and she wouldn’t have it any other way.

  She still sings as she goes, but it’s “head, shoulders, knees, and toes”, and she’s happy with the life she has.

Odes to Comfort Food

I've been feeling under the weather lately, and here are two foods that I find comforting.


Ode to Tomato Soup
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Tomato soup how I love you

You warm me up inside

I feel so comforted by you

When you I imbibe.

When I was young my mother gave

Tomato soup to us

On cloudy days in summer

And cold, cold winter days

When all else fails to cheer me

You bring some sunny rays.

You are high in vitamin c

That fact we can’t deny

But how you comfort, warm, protect,

 And truly satisfy makes you the apple of my eye!

 
Ode to Grilled Cheese
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Grilled cheese oh such yummy stuff

So gooey, warm and good

Dipped into tomato soup

You are a perfect food.

Crunchy on the outside

With your insides soft and warm

Cut in rectangles, squares or triangles,

I love you in any form.

White bread, rye, or on whole wheat

It doesn’t matter much

American, cheddar, provolone

Mozzarella, gouda, swiss

It’s all the same to me,

Toasty yummy, gooey warm,

That’s how you were meant to be.

(S.Donald)

On Loss and Grieving

Sometimes things happen and you don’t know what to say.  Sometimes there just isn’t any right thing to say.  Platitudes and trite sayings just don’t cut it when someone loses a loved one whether it was a total shock, or “expected”.  As if knowing such an event was on the way would bring any comfort!  Words are so very inadequate to express the shock, sadness, sense of loss, devastation that you know are being experienced at least 1,000 fold by the family.  You want to help, do something concrete.  I have sat with a very dear friend who lost her young daughter, just holding her hand, crying, talking, hugging, and expressing disbelief.  I have done this the day after her daughter left the Earth, and many times since in the intervening years.  I tried to figure out what the best thing to do or say is, and the only thing I can say is that it seems not mentioning the person who’s gone is the worst thing to do.  Even when talking about her makes her cry, my friend most wants for her daughter to be remembered.  Talking about those who are no longer with us keeps them present in our lives, helps fill the void somehow even though it is like one raindrop in the ocean.  I often talk about my parents who are both gone, I keep a picture or two of them around, it helps keep them in my life somehow.  Grieving is such an individual thing. There’s no right or wrong way, but not getting stuck in part of the cycle seems to be the key to continuing on with our lives here on Earth.  Just like keeping the pedals on a bicycle in one  position will not allow you to move forward, neither will staying on one part of the grieving cycle.  I know so many people who have lost loved ones recently, husbands, children, parents, siblings, and pets.  It all hurts.  Sometimes I feel like maybe I should edit what I say, what I write, in an effort to be sensitive to their losses.  If I did that, however, I’d be hard pressed to make conversation or write a letter or Facebook status.  We all lose loved ones, it’s part of our journey.  It never seems to make sense why the ones who go are chosen to do so when they are chosen.   I don’t know that we’re supposed to really make sense of it, but we try anyhow.  We’re each on our own life’s journey.  We help each other as best we can, try to learn from each other, and lend some comfort in whatever form—hugs, prayers, listening, holding hands, or just sitting silently side by side passing tissues.

I Remember

I remember the sound of my mother’s laughter.

I remember how my mother called her mother every Thursday morning.

I remember fried eggs on toast for lunch, and fresh veggie sticks in the summer.

I remember fresh black raspberries for our cereal on a summer morning that my mother picked off the bushes in our yard before we were up.

I remember the pride in my mother’s voice when she spoke to others about her children.

I remember the joy on my mother’s face on each of our wedding days.

I remember the tender proud joy of my mother when holding her first grandchild, and her second, and third, and fourth, and fifth!

I remember the first sight of each of my daughter’s faces after they were born.

I remember the pride of showing off each of my babies.

I remember sleepy middle of the night feedings.

I remember singing softly to my babies.

I remember holding the little hands of my girls.

I remember the silkiness of the childhood hair as I braided their hair.

I remember handmade gifts and cards, and bouquets of dandelions.

I remember so much more than there is room for here.

Friday’s Thoughts

1)      Once you’ve been stretched under sedation you are on a first name basis with the doctor who performed the procedure.

2)       When the ice pack feels like you’re getting frost bite it’s time to remove it.

3)      Easter decorations still up at Mother’s Day is just sad (but not as sad as Christmas decorations still up!)

4)      If this house isn’t dusted soon there will be a haboob when we turn on the ceiling fans.

5)      No matter what you say there will be someone who is offended and/or disagrees with you.

6)      Buying and sending greeting cards is a nice thing to do, and it’s fun to read all the cards in the store when picking one out.

7)      It’s comforting to find that the nurse taking care of you grew up right around the corner from you and knows your family.

8)      The doctor that calls you personally at the end of the day after you’ve had a procedure done the morning is a caring person.

9)      There is something magical about the way the sunlight hits the undersides of the tall trees’ leaves as it is setting.

     10)     There’s something about a free weekend that excites the imagination.