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Wednesday, February 7, 2018

"How Is This My Life?"

There is a phrase that I mutter to myself frequently these days usually when I'm in the middle of shoveling snow or working my way through a mountain of laundry on a Sunday afternoon.  I could just as easily say it with a more positive connotation when I'm doing something I really enjoy, or looking at beautiful scenery. That phrase is "how is this my life?"

Sometimes I wonder how I got to this place, this particular moment in time, and became who I am.  I can recount life events and decisions I made that lead to going one direction or the other and put me on the path to now.  For instance, what if I stayed in chemistry in high school, toughed it out instead of dropping it on the third day of school?  What career would I have chosen?  Would I have stayed in college instead of dropping out after the first year?  It's hard to say, but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have met my dear husband and so wouldn't have my 2 girls.  Probably I wouldn't be a lunch lady now.  But if those 2 decisions had been different, I would have missed out on some very dear friends and many eye opening experiences associated with having a child with special needs; and knowing how many hungry families there are right in my own community.  I would have a different house, probably live in a different town and have a very different life.  It's a lot to think about.  I wouldn't want to change anything, I think that my youthful decisions led me to a wonderful place, a good life despite the moments that make me question things.  I believe there would always have been challenges and trials because they are inevitable, just as there would  have been many rewarding moments.  They would be different, I am sure.

I think that as I go forward though life, asking "how is this my life?" is a good way to take stock periodically and gain some perspective.  Maybe make some changes in my thinking and enjoy more of what comes my way.  How is this my life?  Because I have kept moving forward toward whatever comes next.  It's a pretty good life.



1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Excellent perspective!
Ralph